One thing that I didn’t really think about or expect is that motherhood—at least at this stage—comes with many quiet moments. I’ve spent more time sitting under the big red bud tree in our backyard doing nothing more than looking at the leaves and watching baby L take everything in. She particularly enjoys feeling and pulling up the grass and watching the trees move in the wind. And I have to say that I am loving how it feels to rediscover the art of doing nothing.
Before baby, I felt like I had to intentionally carve out time to stop, sit, and be present (or stop, sit, and read a book). But now, those moments of doing nothing other than being are part of the very fabric of my day. The 6-8 times a day that I nurse L, that’s all we’re doing. Sometimes there’s music on or sometimes NPR is on in the background*, but mostly I just enjoy the time to be with the baby and my thoughts. Sure, some of those moments are short because our now 5 month old is intensely curious about everything and can hardly stand to be still long enough to have a full feeding (There are lights to look at! Ooh, there’s the ceiling fan! What’s that out the window! Did I just hear a noise? I want to grab at momma’s face!) but they are moments of pause that are grounding me in my days.
Baby-rearing is a lot of work, but I’m learning to enjoy the rhythm of it, for which I am grateful. And having the time to sit and think** and be is helping me to realize how extraordinarily fortunate I am to get to spend my days with a healthy and funny baby who squeals, squirms, kicks, rolls, and is learning to sit up all on her own.
Hooray for life post-colic!
*We are a decidedly no-tv household during the day during the week. Growing up, I hated that the tv was regularly on in the background (probably because it was mostly Sports Center!) so I’m very intentional about living without that background noise. And I want to avoid the visual distraction for L as long as I possibly can.
**The sitting and thinking is turning out to be great for giving me dedicated time to think through story ideas for work, which is obviously super helpful